Compassionate Presence and Healing Touch, A Lineage of Love

My client lays before me on my Thai mat, having explained the various issues he's currently facing.  Our conversation dissolves as he stretches his long legs toward me and attends to breathing deeply.  I kneel before him, eyes closed, pausing for a silent Wai Kru.  I wait for my own inner chatter to quiet.  When … Continue reading Compassionate Presence and Healing Touch, A Lineage of Love

Attachment Avoidance, Love, Death and Dignity (2/3)

(...continued) content warning: suicidal ideation, graphic imagery I don't want this life; a life that's difficult and lonely.  I don't want to keep on with my impotent love, struggling for something I can't have.  I was so stupid and naive with my hope for this relationship and my own healing.  I want to die.  I … Continue reading Attachment Avoidance, Love, Death and Dignity (2/3)

Sensational, Asinine Things Like “Blossom Your Heart Open”

Usually I wake a few times at night, blankets askew, irritated.  I've either had a really troubling nightmare or heard some bump in the night; likely both.  So I lay there, exhausted, frustrated, needing and wanting sleep that doesn't come.  Eventually the alarm goes off and I rise, grudging.  Some time later I'll unroll my … Continue reading Sensational, Asinine Things Like “Blossom Your Heart Open”

Why Showing Up Early Is Terrible and Wonderful

I had an odd midday meeting between classes, and now I have an hour before I need to be at Durham VA to teach.  Coffeeshops make me uneasy now, so I figure I'll get some work done in my car.  I park in the lot facing traffic--I can't tolerate the sound of it behind me, … Continue reading Why Showing Up Early Is Terrible and Wonderful