Growing From Cracked Cement: Zinnias and Resilience

Gardening was solace and joy, hope and inspiration, nourishment, connection and peace.  Spring's bare beds were full of possibility.  I grinned with delight putting seeds in the ground, chattered with excitement in the garden store selecting plants with Christian.  I lit up as the first tiny seedlings emerged new from the earth each year--and each … Continue reading Growing From Cracked Cement: Zinnias and Resilience

Loneliness, Binge Eating and Being In Love

I stand in my friend's kitchen.  Her cats wolf down their food.  The sun streams in all the windows, drawing shifting stripes across the daffodil yellow countertops.  It's Saturday.  I drink sparkling water from a green can and sigh; I'm tired and cranky and it has occurred to me that my friend's seriously righteous candy … Continue reading Loneliness, Binge Eating and Being In Love

Bad Memories and The Power Of Secure Attachment

The week of the Kavanaugh hearings I have flashbacks.  I'm lying on my yoga mat in my boyfriend's bedroom while he works downstairs. I'm driving as I catch sight of my abuser strolling toward me near the courthouse.  Bile rises in my throat, my knuckles turn white, and my heart is pounding so loudly it … Continue reading Bad Memories and The Power Of Secure Attachment